To all of the women wanting to be moms…
Needless to say, Mother’s Day can be challenging when you are struggling with infertility, but the truth is most days are challenging when you are struggling with infertility. Dealing with infertility is isolating. Most women suffer alone. If you are struggling with infertility, you probably feel as though your body has betrayed you, not being able to execute its most basic human function. It happens at a time when your peers are getting pregnant. It feels as though everybody is pregnant except you. The invitations to baby showers continually rub salt in the wounds. Every negative pregnancy test is more painful than one before. Any month that you don’t have the opportunity to try feels like an eternity. Your friends and family tell you to “just relax”, because obviously you would be pregnant if you were more relaxed. So on top of feeling sad and shameful and alone, you also feel guilty for not being relaxed.
I once had a breast cancer survivor tell me her battle with infertility was more painful than her battle with cancer. But have no doubt, infertility is a disease. Just as nobody chooses to have cancer, you did not choose to have infertility. It is not your fault. You are not doing anything wrong. The universe is not telling you that you are not supposed to be a mother. The universe is challenging you. It has handed you one of life’s most difficult challenges.
You are not alone. Approximately one out of every 10 women suffer from infertility. Find them, talk to them, lean on them. In my experience, they are the only ones who will truly know your suffering. Be kind to yourself. Treat yourself to the support you need – a therapist, an acupuncturist, a mindfulness coach, a trainer. Whatever it is that lightens your load. And hang there. You will get through this.
Sending you positive energy on a very challenging day,
Meredith and the rest of your Kindbody team